“Nothing is permanent in this wicked world – not even our troubles.”
~Charlie Chaplin

Let go.  Purge.  Forgive.  Move on.

We hear these phrases all too often when we talk with our friends or family about whatever those things are that we hang on to, and that slowly eat away at us.  Sure, ok, but it is really much easier said than done.  What does it really mean to do all those things?  How do you let go?

It wasn’t until a few weeks ago when I was reading an article in the most recent issue of O Magazine about making your home a sanctuary that “Letting Go” clicked for me.  The article was based on a book called Soul Space by Xorin Balbes.  The idea is that we live in a hectic world, and when we come home, we should feel like we are being welcomed into our own personal retreat.  The article was timely, as I have been in a purge all the “stuff” from my apartment craze.  I can purge with the best of them – the air mattress I haven’t used in 4 years.  Gone.  The tax returns from the 90s – shredded.

After reading the article, I started looking at all of my “stuff” through different eyes.  It was no longer a question of “Have I used this in the last 6 months?”  Now, the question “How does this make me feel?” became part of my routine.  What I realized is that while I do a good job of purging old clothes or other household items at least twice a year, I don’t do such a good job of purging the things that hold emotional value, especially those that bring up old feelings of hurt, heartbreak, or just hold no value at all anymore.  This purging craze has taken on a whole new meaning.

In the span of one week, I came across a handful of things that washed me over with all the emotions of an old heartbreak.  Letters (the handwritten kind) and photos.  I’m not ready to let go of them just yet (and I’m not sure I ever will be), but what I did find is that I felt all those emotions of loss and love again.  After a little time passed and I sorted through more things, I had this A-ha moment. I had let go in that instant.  I set the love and the hurt free.  I realized it was a wonderful time in my life, and I have so many amazing memories that I don’t need to let the rest of it define me (or make me think I am anything less than awesome and worthy of great things).  I decided right then that I can no longer allow the hurt and anger take the front seat on my new journey toward bliss.  Letting go is hard.  Forgiveness is hard.  I had to allow myself to really feel the loss, but then had to make the decision to turn the page.  Life is like those old books where you could choose what happened next.  I want to see where this life takes me when I choose to turn the page to a new chapter.

Let Go.  Purge. Forgive.  Move On.
None of it means forgetting about the past, it just means we are opening ourselves up to the possibilities that lie ahead.  Only this time, we have some experience under our belts.